A Manly List of Greats

If one actually googles "Askmen," you're presented with pages
of buxom young women.  Don't know what he was doing there.

This in from Askmen, apparently how to "become a better man".  Announcing (drum roll, please):  The Top 10 Classical Pieces Men Should Know, written by Steven Shaw and sponsored by Lexus (ok, I'm already out of my league).

The author prefaces, While we accept that classical music is not necessarily to everyone’s taste, a basic knowledge of it is as integral to our cultural understanding as is an appreciation for the paintings of the Old Masters, or da Vinci. Composers used a different medium, but nevertheless their work is art.  Gee, I'm glad we got that out of the way.   Ooooh, he starts at Number 10!  The suspense is killing me.

10.  Vivaldi:  Four Seasons (snore).  It's been used in lots of soundtracks, therefore it's great.

9.  Beethoven:  "Ode to Joy" (the hell with the rest of the symphony).  Oh yeah, and this one has been in Clockwork Orange, Die Hard and many more!

8.  Richard Strauss:  Also sprach Zarathustra (hmm...interesting).  But, of course, the author must add, "undoubtedly made famous by its use in 2001: A Space Odyssey, it is now almost synonymous with any space-related cinematography."

7.  Holst:  "Mars" and "Jupiter" from The Planets (again, screw the rest of the piece).  BUT, this list is certainly getting much more interesting as we go along.

6.  Wagner:  "Ride of the Valkyries."  Gotta know "Kill da Wabbit," right?

5.  Bach:  "Toccata and Fugue" (assuming that he means the one in d-minor).  The author adds, "Often linked to a brooding vampire playing alone in his mansion. Also used in video games and rock music."  That's right; Bach believed in Vlad the Impaler.

4.  Pachelbel:  Canon (barf).  I can't help but share this wonderful link.

3.  Puccini:  "Nessun dorma," from Turandot.  Of course a video of Pavarotti singing accompanies the title.  Oh yes, and you're likely to hear it at sporting events (really?)

2.  Barber:  Adagio for Strings.  Funeral music.  "It has been voted the saddest piece of classical music ever composed."

1.  (I'm dying to know....)  OMG:  Orff:  "O Fortuna" from Carmina Burana, a chorus from a piece I probably despise like no other.  "It also topped a list of the most-played classical music of the last 75 years."  Hrumph!

Nowhere in the article is Mr. Shaw identified.  I guess if I came up with "Charlie Tuna" as number 1, I'd want to remain anonymous.